Steve Kay
Mar 24th 2006
MY UPDATE PAGE
March 24, 2006. Friday. Shari Carlson brought a blanket to sleep in the big blue chair. She suggested that I take 16 drops of morphine and 2 Ativan while I was still sitting in the black chair. That way when I got into bed I wouldn't be out of air. I did it. I waited for a few minutes and then got into bed. It was a lot smoother. I was ok. I wasn't gasping for air. I gave Shari some earplugs. In the middle of the night about 4am I woke up. I couldn't sleep. Shari made me a cup of peppermint tea and got me a glass of Ms. Lifong's water. I took 16 drops of morphine and then 2 more Ativan. That put me out. When I woke up Shari was gone. It was about 8am.
I got up and started off at 9:15am with Lydia. She arrived and ran my bath. I was pretty groggy. I was feeling weak in the legs and Lydia saw me to the bathroom. I got in the tub but noticed it seemed like a lot more effort to get out this morning. My legs were wobbly. I got out of the tub and got dressed. Lydia left after that.
My sister called and said she was on the way with her friend Jenn. The Apria people called about 11am and said that they would be delivering the hospital bed between noon and 5pm if I had a space for it. I got stressed. The wheels went into motion and the next thing I notice Maurice had taken time from his busy schedule to arrange with Mosalino the maintenance manager at SOMA to store my old bed. I had no bed for a few hours. Then Howard Meehan arrived. A few minutes later my sister and her friend Jenn arrived. It seemed like just moments later the Apria delivery guys arrived. There were 5 or 6 people in my apartment at one time. In the middle of all this Evelyn from Shanti was in the kitchen making me a smoothie. Unbelievable. I was getting overwhelmed. The first Apria guy in the door took one look at the space and immediately said "the space is to small". What he didn't know is that Maurice and I had measured the space and called the office and already knew it was just fine. The Apria delivery team set up the bed. They had brought an air mattress but it was to hot so I had them take it off. The bed also didn't have room for the guard rails so we left them off as well. I was glad of that. I remember to many times at Maitri thinking of those rails as some form of jail. That was not a happy memory.
My sister and Jen tried out the new bed while I sat in the big blue chair. Howard had to leave after only a short visit. My Dad called in the middle of everything and I couldn't talk to him right then. Michael called. I talked to Charles Sterck about the vigil program. He is organizing it. Contact him if you would like to volunteer.
Matt the filer called to check in.
Jose asked me if he could bring his family this Saturday to my house. I said "yes".
I was super happy to get a phone call from my best friend in the whole world from Orlando. He said he had missed me. I told him I missed him too but understood that different people dealt with death in different ways. I still loved him and understood. He invited me to call him tomorrow. Wow!!! I was real happy to get that phone call.
I am having a lot of wheezing and am doing my best to deal with everything. I gave my sister and her friend a copy of my film. Jenn gave me a really great foot massage. I had a great day with my sister and Jenn. I really appreciate them coming all the way from Oregon to see me.
I didn't get out today but with all of the things going on inside I really didn't miss it.
It was another quality day.
Michael is scheduled to do a vigil watch tonight from 2am. I feel much more secure at that time of the morning with someone here. It gets a little scary coughing and coughing and nothing coming up. Then when all of my muscles tighten up I get anxious. The morphine and Ativan have helped take the edge off but it seems I am taking more and more to curb the edge.
My goal at this point is to live until at least April 1st so I will be able to be at the baptism of my name sake and God son Danielle Estaban Bobadilla.
Steve
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